Shower Me with Compliments

Kids have an innate ability to make their parents feel like they are the most unattractive human beings on the face of the planet, especially their mothers.  They deprive us of sleep and suck the life out of us.  Not only did I suffer 10 months of haulin their asses around (I hated pregnancy), but they seem to remind me of my “mom bod” on the daily.

It is a million degrees outside currently and I hate the heat.  I love nice weather, but I usually tap out around 75 or 80 degrees Fahrenheit.  We have done a ton of swimming this summer so there has been a lot of sunscreen application.  (Note: applying sunscreen to a baby is comparable to wrestling a greased pig, but being just careful enough to not get it in their eyes or mouth.)  19748668_856439448182_5803820596675168684_n

Our stroller and car seat for the little man are currently stained white due to the amount of sunscreen his little white bod requires.  I digress.  Sass also hates sunscreen application, heaven forbid she stops her Evil Knievel scooter tricks into traffic for 90 seconds to have SPF applied.  Upon explaining to her that sunburns hurt really bad and cause wrinkles she replied “That’s okay mom. I want wrinkles, just like you.”  In addition to that gleefully pleasant compliment she tells me on the regular that I have cracks in my forehead.

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As I stated previously, it is hotter than the depths of hell outside right now.  So I have been rocking a lot of shorts, tanks…apparel to keep cool, the usual.  Like most women, at least most women/mothers I know, I don’t shave my legs every single day.  I am usually an every other day type of gal in the summer.  Leg shaving season is A LOT of work.  This morning sass came downstairs happy as could be when she woke up (at 9:34 am mind you – mom win!). She climbed on my lap and wrapped her tiny arms around me and exclaimed “Good Morning Mommy!”  Right after her pleasant, little greeting she told me “Mom, you need to cut off your skin, you have spikes, see these points?” Dully noted, kid.

Henceforth, like most women who have had children, I have some saggy skin on my tummy.  It has faint silvery stretch marks and I never comment on them or point it out in front of my kids.  I want my children to think motherhood is beautiful; saggy skin and all.  The baby loves to pinch my belly, a lot.  I have no idea what his fascination is with it, but he cracks up.  Maybe this is the baby version of play doh.  In addition, every time I rock a bikini sass makes sure to point out that I have a squishy tummy.  Without skippin a beat I reply with “Yes I grew two babies in there, I had to make room somehow!”

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If you want to know how you really look, just ask a 4 year old, she is sure to point out all of your troublesome areas and boost your confidence.  Below is Sass showering me with compliments…

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